Teen Dating Violence - It Does Happen!

Dating violence is defined as the perpetration or threat of an act of violence by at least one member of an unmarried couple on the other member within the context of dating or courtship. This violence encompasses any form of sexual assault, physical violence, and verbal or emotional abuse.

Would you know what to do if you were faced or possibly you are in a relationship with someone that is not treating you right. Or, maybe you have a friend who is being abused by a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Perhaps your boyfriend or girlfriend is controlling you in ways that make you feel bad. Such as you they want to know and question where you have been or who you have been with all the time. They may show distrust in you, follow you, make you call them all the time to check in with them.

Does your boyfriend/girlfriend make you feel guilty for wanting to spend time with other friends. Do they bully you and or threaten you? Do they follow you where ever you go or show up if you are doing something away from them and just watch you?

How about hurting you physically? Perhaps they may just grab your arm to hard and hurt you. Then tell you they are sorry and do it again and each time it gets a little worse.

Here are some warning signs that you might be in an abusive relationship with someone.

 Your boy/girl friend makes you feel guilty all the time.
 Your boy/girl friend puts you down.
 Your boy/girl friend yells at you.
 Your boy/girl friend slaps, pushes, hits, or kicks you or threatens to do so.
 Your boy/girl friend uses physical force on you.
 He/She forces you to have sex when you say NO or possibly wont use protection during sex.
 Forces you to do things you are not comfortable doing.
 Uses drugs or alcohol and forces you to use it also and if you say no are you afraid of what he/she might do to you.
 If you break up with him/her they refuse to accept it and harasses or stalks you.
 Calls you things that hurts, such as degrading things alone or in front of others.
 Takes your money and/or controls your money.
 Possessive or jealous of you and or friends or family.
 Insists you don't go places without him/her.
 Hurts you in any way, then tells you how sorry they are, they may even cry, and promises to never do it again and then it happens all over again .

This is called the Cycle of Abuse, and it wont stop till you have the courage to speak up and say, “No More!” If you answered yes to any of these things above, you are not in a healthy relationship with someone. It might start out as little small things, but over time someone that is abusive will get worse.

The important thing to know is that domestic violence happens to teens as well, and it’s not your fault and most important - you cannot change someone else. This is serious and you need to tell someone. Don't be silent about it - speak up and break the silence and end it. Perhaps you have a friend that is being abused. Don't be afraid to confront them on it. Let them know you see the things their boyfriend or girlfriend is doing and that you want to help them get help. Offer to go with them to tell someone.

If someone hurts you or makes you feel scared or bad in any way, it is most important to talk about it and tell someone what is going on. Tell your parents, a teacher or another adult you can trust. You can also go to a local domestic violence program in your area for help. If you are unsure of that, just look in the yellow pages under "Abuse" or "Domestic Violence." (Check out our Hotlines List) The National Domestic Violence Hotline in the US is: 800-799-7233, or 1-866-331-9474

If you are ever faced in a situation where your boyfriend or girlfriend is threatening to hurt you call the police (911) for help immediately." You Are Not Alone".
Most of this article was written for us by:

For More, check out the links on the Anger Page...

Check out Violence and Teenagers... and Avoiding Anger if they are of interest, there are also videos for the same topics and our Violence article too. You might also want to read more on Self-esteem... you do not deserve to be treated this way, you are a valuable and unique person.

Check out Part II of this article for more >>